MythBusters: University Edition

You’re going to hear a lot of things when your first year of university is approaching. Often, the most ridiculous things are true and the mundane, false. So if you find yourself freaking out about being taunted by a grumpy third-year then you better keep reading, because it’ll probably happen at least once in your first year.

Down with the hierarchy!

Unfortunately, the whole hierarchical thing still exists at university as it will in all facets of life. Depending on your pure dumb luck, you may escape your first year well-treated and unscathed. If not then you’ll probably find yourself eagerly walking into a lecture too early to the assault of, “Jaffy” being thrown at you repeatedly. Just Another Fucking First Year or as it’s more affectionately known abbreviation, Jaffy will come in every form possible depending on your uni. It really is just a natural thing so you may as well take advantage of it by soaking up all the far more lenient treatment first-years receive.

Attendance doesn’t matter

Varying on your university, attendance may or may not matter but if it does, it really does. To fail on attendance despite smashing out the subject is possibly the worst way to fail a subject, ever. In most cases, you’re giving an allowance of tutorials you’re allowed to skip out on but if you start missing more than the given quota then shit will begin to hit the fan.

First year doesn’t count

It does but it also doesn’t. By the latter, I mean it’s the experimental year to figure out study methods, your course and the subjects within it. A weekly party will also distract you from studies as will new friends and the feeling that you’re starting to get your life together. However, first year does count in the way of your GPA and WAM. You will soon discover that studying immensely and scoring top marks will only improve your GPA by 0.1 at most, so every single mark counts. Especially if you’re looking to transfer courses or apply for exchange so while you’re having all the fun that comes with first-year, think of second-year you and how close graduation will seem then.

Failing is the end of the world

The bottom line is that if you fail a core subject you shed a tear for the money that will be added to your HECS fee then repeat the subject. If it’s not a core subject, then shed another tear then move onto an easier subject. You will graduate a semester later to make up for the failure but who wants to step into the real world anyway? No harm, no foul especially in first-year – failing can be an occupational hazard to the new environment.

Your teachers will be unforgiving vultures

In Year 12 you get the, “You wouldn’t get away with this at university” and then in first-year uni you’ll cop the, “It’s time to harden up” so it must be true. And it is but it’s a mighty slow transition. Despite everything said lecturers will point you in the direction of counsellors if you seek help and guide you through the online portal so that you know how to submit your assignments online. Tutors will spend the majority of the first tutorial making sure everyone can access the unit guide and will give you a physical copy of all the upcoming assessments – something that is actually a mythical act in second-year and onward.

In saying that, you will be expected to hand in all your assignments on time. Late submissions is something your lecturers and tutorials will be immediately strict about.

Your social life will sky-rocket

If they’re not already, some of your friends will become club promoters and give you a mates rate entry, others will tag you in upcoming university parties or invite you out for a gig. You’ll gather friends to go festival-ing and be able to afford smashed avo once in a while. But in a relationship sense? That’s all up to you but there’s a 100% guarantee you’ll be in for some saucy goss because everyone gets together in first-year.